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How to deal with rejection
Tips to make rejections useful for your career
Every person encounters rejection at some point in their career. Embracing rejection early on is one of the secrets to personal growth so that we know how to handle it when the stakes get bigger.
The absence of rejection indicates one of two things: either you are exceptionally determined and clear with your next steps while not being a stranger to luck, or you are settling for the most obvious path with minimal effort, sometimes without even realising it.
More likely than not, if you’re asking yourself about rejection while trying to be intentional about your career, like us, you are part of the latter group.
Especially at the beginning of your career, it is so rare to have everything lined up and figured out. Most people learn to deal with uncertainty early on, making mistakes along the way or going for a too big leap.
Sometimes rejection means that we are not good enough at something (yet) and we should go back to learning. Other times, a rejection has nothing to do with your qualifications or experiences, but it’s instead a result of circumstances and factors beyond your control.
But no matter what the cause is, getting rejected is never a good experience and leaves us full of questions: “Why did I make such a mistake?” or “Why did I even try in the first place?”
Can we avoid rejection?
The short answer is no. But we can get better at it.
The reason why rejection feels so harsh is because we are not used to it. Humans are inherently people pleasers (some more than others) and you only get rejected if you ask for something outside your comfort zone.
The antidote?
Start putting yourself in positions to be rejected so that you train your “rejection muscle” and the next time you won’t feel as sore as the time before.
We know it’s easier said than done but you could apply this to virtually anything: from applying for the job you always wanted to launch a side business to asking cashiers for a 10% discount.
What to do after a big rejection?
In addition to feeling sad or frustrated, here are a few things to make the most out of it:
1. Take your time
Especially if it is about something you care for, don’t act on impulse.
2. Gather feedback
Try to learn more about the rejection. If it’s a career rejection, ask the hiring team or HR department for more details on why your application was not a fit. For example, you can ask them to jump to a 10-minute call where you won’t try to change their mind but are genuinely curious to improve. Many people are ok with providing feedback as long as you keep your end of the deal.
3. Process the feedback
Understand what led to the negative outcome. “Was your application lacking key knowledge or experience? Or was the application completely off for the role/company?”
This is the most delicate part of the entire process as it requires a high dose of self-awareness and criticism. The easiest way to get to the truth is to ask a friend or someone you trust to help you with this - it’s incredible how easily another person can find our blind spots.
4. Act accordingly
Depending on what you learned from the previous step, it’s now time to plan your next move.
“Do you need more preparation before going after that same opportunity? Do you need to expand your network first? Or do you need to completely change your path?”
The sign of a good feedback session is that at this point, you can plan your next steps with much more clarity. But if you feel just as stuck as before, go back to the feedback session and ask someone else to help you get to the truth.
Rejections are precious because they open your eyes to things you might not have considered before. Sometimes they also help us better define ourselves: going through a rejection can turn into a powerful resource to improve how we see ourselves, together with our limits and the role ambition plays in our decisions.
Going through a big rejection is a long process so arm yourself with patience and make sure you don’t get discouraged too easily. Each rejection leads you closer to your next opportunity.
If you enjoyed this issue, share it with someone dealing with a rejection.
This week's top scientific reads
B cells as drug factories (Nature Biotechnology)
The best in-vitro model so far for colorectal cancer (Nature Biotechnology)
FDA approval for the latest Alzheimer’s drug from Eli Lilly to slow cognitive decline (NBC News)
A molecular glue degrader can cure sickle cell disease (Science)
A nutrient-delivery therapy to reactivate metabolism against melanoma (Nature Nanotechnology)
Latest European funding rounds in health & bio
Amethyst Radiotherapy raised €300M to develop radiotherapy and radiosurgery treatments for oncology patients 🇦🇹
e-therapeutics raised €34M for its computational drug discovery platform 🇬🇧
Healthtech 1 raised €2.8M to further develop and commercialize its administrative task automation platform for NHS registrations 🇬🇧
Kvantify raised €9.2M to advance its drug discovery platform powered by quantum computing technology 🇩🇰
BionIT Labs raised €5.5M to develop prosthetic limbs 🇮🇹
GoJoe raised €2.9M for its employee health and fitness app 🇬🇧
Myricx Bio raised €106M to advance discovery and development of antibody-drug conjugates to treat cancer 🇬🇧
SciRhom closed a €63M Series A to develop therapeutic iRhom2 antibodies for autoimmune diseases 🇩🇪
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